Three people in the last three days have asked me what I want to be and/or do, and I don't know how to answer them.
For the first time in my life I am not living in the future. I have no idea what this time next year will look like or where I will be. Is that smart? I dont know, but I believe that there is a reason for this feeling. The not knowing seems to makes sense.
I had lunch with a wonderful new friend today. I'm beginning to connect with people and that feels really good.
I'm still figuring out my place in this city, but I am okay with who I am again, and can be myself without feeling apologetic and deficient. I am on a path that will have many avenues and cross with things I don't understand, and that is good. I feel stronger now. I can walk this path, meet these people, have these experiences and take parts of all of it to add to Life's puzzle. Crazy beautiful mangled perfection this Life. And I am grateful to live it.
I am confident.
I am insecure.
I am brave.
I am a coward.
I am calm.
I am in awe.
I am fearless.
I am scared.
I am ready. And I have never felt more alive.
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